why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
