did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Randomize
