what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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