Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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