Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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