Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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