Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize