I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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