considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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