Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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