Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Randomize
