Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
