I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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