just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
