why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
that is very illegal...i love you.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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