Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
