Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize