no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
