I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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