Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
