I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize