he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Randomize