How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
The cops high fived after they tackled you
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
