was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Randomize
