Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
