My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
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