also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
