but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
