Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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