A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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