So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
My dad just said "fuck circus"
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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