I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
