i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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