I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
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