You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
