We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
