The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
