u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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