i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize
