she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
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