all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize