this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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