I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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