Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
