So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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