I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
