Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
