we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize