Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Randomize
