my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
