Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He did a backflip because drugs
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