I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
